The Decline of Civilization

Ha! I bet you were thinking, "well it was fun while it lasted, but he's run out of things to write after one month."  No sir I have not run out of things to write or say.  The truth of the matter is that the semi-beloved laptop on which I write these posts went viral on Tuesday night.  Not viral in the good I-got-a-million-hits-on-YouTube way either, but the soul crushing, losing everything you didn't know you loved way.  I thought that people only got virii on their computers when they looked at creepy porn.  Well they don't.  Apparently they also lurk in innocent looking worksheets used to teach youngsters the parts of the microscope.  I guess the joke is on me because my laptop is now a brick until I can get it back to the US.

Which brings me to this:

In a world where we need to put "Do Not Attempt" disclaimers in commercials showing cars skidding around on ice is it really a good idea to put this on a product that is applied to one's body?  Not to mention that this is not EXTREME deodorant, it's Old Spice.  I'm not twelve.  I don't need to be entertained with amusing visuals while applying the deodorant in the morning.  What's more troubling is that someone got paid actual money to write this.  I can just picture a bunch of guys sitting around a room trying to figure out how to write a catchy description of deodorant and coming up with this.  My guess is that the original one said that the "stench monsters" were replaced with " fresh, clean scent elves" when some suit who makes money per year than I will see in my lifetime read it.

"'Scent Elves?"
"Yes it's funny." replies the midlevel executive who wrote it.
"It's not funny, it's gay.  Our product is marketed as MANLY."
"Well what if the 'scent elves' were 'masculine,' 'masculine scent elves'."
"Yeah that's better."

I like to wear Old Spice because it is ridiculous, but I'm not down with it being ridiculous like this.  I miss the days when nothing was EXTREME.  Apparently even here in the third world it cannot be avoided.

I suppose I should congratulate the Old Spice executives because they just got me to repost a picture of their product on my blog... Good job guys. 

We're all doomed.